They shut down the mine last summer. We're gettin' by on welfare It's Christmas Eve, I'm walkin' home, not a dollar to my name Night is almost on me. A night I'm almost dreading No store bought gifts to open, but there'll be Christmas just the same
Folks, Christmas songs set in Kentucky are bleak. Phil Ochs’s “Christmas in Kentucky” coldly notes that “jingle bells don't jingle when you're poor,” and Kinsey Rose’s “Blue Kentucky Christmas” notes that “Mama’s burning biscuits, grandma’s drunk again.”
Yes, I know we’re not Kentucky. Yes, I know this state has a rich musical tradition, along with several artists like Charlie Daniels, the Marshall Tucker Band, and Squirrel Nut Zippers that have written songs specifically about Christmas in North Carolina. Still though, we don’t have a holiday song that evokes as much raw emotion as a tune written about a Kentucky coal mining family.
So, let’s write one.
Here’s how (I hope) this will work: In the comments below, please write one single line that you think should be in a song about North Carolina. Then the next person will come along and write the next line, and so on. Will this work? Will this devolve into complete crowdsourced chaos? Yes? No? In any event, let’s see if the hivemind can write us a Christmas song.
I don't think I can do better than Western North Carolina singer-songwriter Malcolm, who wrote a song called "Merry Christmas" a few years ago. He recorded the track with Iris DeMent for his "Hell or High Water" album of 2018.
Here's the chorus and a couple of versus to get a feel, but I hope you give it a listen:
A little country but always proper
Take off your sweater
Twist it ‘round like a helicopter
All y’all best be hurryin’ up,
‘cause MeMaw’s done run out of snuff.
1. It's Christmas time in the Tar Heel State
2. Please don't let Santa Claus be late.
3. We're so purple, we're feelin' blue.
4. It's time to pop a Yuletide brew
5. Because my cigarettes are down to a few.
6. I could be in the mountains or at the beach, but I'd rather be with you
- At Christmas time in the Tar Heel State. -
7. Where is that snoring coming from? Must be Grandpa Hugh
8. But we’ll spread the cheer with some barbecue,
9. And I’ll pair some whiskey with my pork
10. Uncle Jack's looking fine is his red glittery tulle, and Im baking gingerbread while my brother rolls a few.
11. A little country but always proper. Take off your sweater. Twist it ‘round like a helicopter.
12. This year Santa’s a little bit rounder
‘Cause he’s full of that Christmas Flounder.
- When its Christmas time in the Tar Heel State. -
Raise glass of cheer wine
To long leaf pines
and kudzu vines
To yours and mine
We all be fine
We're so purple, we're feelin' blue.
My Bojangles biscuit and sweet tea hit the spot,
Mama is stirring collards in a giant cast iron pot!
If you’re a reindeer better hope I don’t see ya
Cause you’ll be in my aunts stew down in Conetoe
I was walking past a coal ash pond covered in snow
This year Santa’s a little bit rounder
‘Cause he’s full of that Christmas Flounder*
* https://www.ourstate.com/the-tall-tale-of-the-christmas-flounder/
It's Christmas time in the Tar Heel state
Grandpa Bubba blew a tire, rolling over black walnuts in a sack
And Aunt Sister's stirring Velveeta into her cheese and mac
Dogs and young'uns in the kitchen,
tell Aunt June to quit her bitchin'
Nana's gonna cook those chitlins
The Christmas season is almost on ya...
Season's greetings from here in Gastonia!
Squirrel Nut Zippers “Carolina Christmas”
https://youtu.be/nivsq8Heh1c
Uncle Jack's looking fine is his red glittery tulle, and Im baking gingerbread while my brother rolls a few.
Adding to...
(1) It's Christmas time in the Tar Heel State
(2) We're so purple we're feeling blue
(My add) I could be in the mountains or at the beach, but I'd rather be with you
Because my cigarettes are down to a few.
<Just realized you have to select chronological order>
It's time to pop a Yuletide brew
I completely agree
And come winter there’s much to do
Something for you and you and you
We’ll all don our fanciest dress
Go ride on the Polar Express
On the mantle we’ll hang our sock
And then drive up to Blowing Rock.
From there it’s to the Outer Banks
Have some dinner(or supper) and give our thanks
For the greatest state in the land
Grab a partner, strike up the band.
**and I’m envisioning some banjo and violin(or fiddle) accompaniment and, of course, some jug music as a nod to moonshine**
Belk ain’t what used to be,
no Belkie for the winter
But at Christmastime I know
That I’ll be shopping til last minute
And Southpark Mall’ll be open late
To guarantee my purchase
In the end I know that Santa
Claus is in it just to win it.
Smell of the Pine on a cold snowy morning.
"the night was still /
they shut down the mill /
the sofas we made won't keep paying the bills / ... "
Kids from Murphy to Manteo
Wishing for a little snow
Let’s go to Christmas Town to see
A long line of red lights at exit 23
We're getting a North Carolina Christmas tree, felled right here in Ashe Counteeee
I don't think I can do better than Western North Carolina singer-songwriter Malcolm, who wrote a song called "Merry Christmas" a few years ago. He recorded the track with Iris DeMent for his "Hell or High Water" album of 2018.
Here's the chorus and a couple of versus to get a feel, but I hope you give it a listen:
merry christmas fried chicken
left overs in the mornin'
never got what i wanted
never kept what i got
merry christmas
fruit cake is the best
save yourself for the rest
two dollars for the children
merry christmas
brylcream ol spice
aqua velva it aint nice
coon track change a tire
merry christmas
sellin' grit for a nickle
shovel coal in the stoker
daddy's drunk doncha know it
merry christmas
runnin' chains in the snow
go to church when ya go
go to hell if ya dont
merry christmas
Cheers!